Thursday, July 19, 2012

the final stretch

(Advance warning: it is far too hot, and I am far too stressed for cooking. Therefore this is general rambling about life, and not life+food, as most of my meals lately have been cereal or toast-based)

At about 10:45 Tuesday morning, apparently DC was the hottest place in the US. Probably because the sun was still rising over places like Death Valley. Either way, I think we can all agree that 100 degrees or more is HOT. And once again I blame the heat for my brain functioning on a seriously compromised level. 

Last week, I got off the metro at the wrong stop on the way to work, then Monday, I paid no mind whatsoever to the color of the train pulling in to the station and got on the wrong line on my way to class. And Tuesday? Tuesday I left work with the intention of going home to study for my final, and found myself instead buying four, yes FOUR, sweaters. On a record-breakingly hot day. When I had just finished complaining about being broke. And today might actually be the most embarrassing of all: I commuted to work with mascara ALL OVER my eyes.

Because, to circle back, the heat is melting my brain. In my defense, all four sweaters cost me $20 as part of an odd, off-season buy one/get one free sale on winter wares. I have no way to defend myself on the "should've web studying" front.  Definitely have no excuse for the raccoon eyes.

Speaking of studying, with my final exactly five days from now (the same day, by the way, that the quarterly report to Congress I work on goes to press), I'm right back in the grumpy place I was pre-midterm. I'm always like this before exams, public speaking, and doctor appointments. I spend far too long thinking about just how much I don't want to do the task at hand instead of just growing up and preparing for it. I daydream about skipping it, not preparing for it, avoiding it somehow. Extremely mature, really. So anyways, final exam stress + work stress + crazy heat = sad, defeated little Jenny. Much like actual little Jenny years and years ago. Not sure what heinously dreadful task I was facing this particular day, but I think my little four-year-old face says it all, no?  

The original version of this, which includes my equally bummed-looking little sis, was posted months ago, but I really don't think there's any better way to capture my current state of being, minus a present-day photo, and I look as rough as I feel right now, so no camera is coming anywhere near my tired face.

For now, I'm going to continue on in my general state of denial and think happy thoughts about escaping to someplace a little like this...

(taken summer 2007 on the last family Maui trip)

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